community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
