just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
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I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
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I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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