Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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