Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
