why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
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When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.