so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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