Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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