hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
