I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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