awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
