Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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