I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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