someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
