11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
tell me about the eggs
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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