I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
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You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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