We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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