Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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