I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize