Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
