apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
