On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
