we're chasing vodka with high fives
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize