is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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