the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
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I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
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I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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