Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
