I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize