That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
