Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
