is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
