Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
My breasts were aching with rage.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
