their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
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I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
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Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's