i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Randomize
