Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
