yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
