dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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