I could make wine with my vomit
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Randomize
