Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
