you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
where are my eyebrows?
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