so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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