he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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