Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I am mentally ready for anal.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
