so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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