you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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