Im at strip club and am horny
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
