we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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