it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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