Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
