I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
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It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
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You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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