Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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