somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
wanna go halves on a baby?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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