you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Randomize
