Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
