kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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